Oh hello! Erm, I'm beginning to realize that there have been quite a few visits to this blog, something which is a little unexpected. I don't know how it is you have come to read this blog, whether it is because I have left comments on petite's page and people have clicked the link to see who I am or people have found it for other reasons but I would be interested in finding out who you are and how you have come across my page and more especially what you think (even if it is harsh – I can take it I'm a big girl and if anyone does have anything particularly nasty to say, they are not at all obliged to read my blog!).
I think given the interest I should perhaps explain a few things.
Firstly as you can see, I'm not very good at the upkeep of my blog (as I am not very good at the upkeep of many things in life!) and don't really know a lot about blogging (why do I feel like Julie Andrews as Maria Von Trapp when I say this?), you may have gathered this from my "why blogger" post and the blogging crisis I had a few months ago. I do have a camera but don't get much of a chance at taking pictures and posting them. I can happily oblige if people think my blog lacks pictures.
Secondly, this is not really a personal diary. I used to keep a diary and used to cringe when rereading it, and this was a diary I used to keep hidden under a cupboard so lord knows I don't want to be going on about my personal life in the public arena. No one in my personal circle aside from Monsieur knows about this blog (and he doesn't seem to read it) and so its not a letter home or a way of communicating to my nearest and dearest about what I do here in France (they get it first hand anyway through e-mails and telephone calls). I'm quite happy to share certain details of my private life given that I'm writing under a pen name but the aim of this blog is to write short (ok then long) comments about my life in France, should this interest anyone who happens upon it. Personal blogs can be very interesting, (I very much enjoying reading some of them and if anyone has any others to recommend I would like to know). I especially like anecdotes of family life but I myself only write things that I think might interest people and I don't kid myself into thinking that other people would really care about my life (not that I'm criticizing anyone for doing so). My other reason is that I personally feel that if you put your personal life in the public arena, people will then decide to judge you on it, something which I absolutely do not want. For me this is a private blog (hence why I have limited the comment option but you are quite free to e-mail me), its use and content may change over time but for now I prefer just to make my own observations on my life in France and the experiences I have had.
Thirdly, I'm not a writer. I have an idea of a book in my head, based on a very strange experience I had during my Erasmus year but if I had wanted to be a writer surely I would have written the book by now. I quite enjoy recounting anecdotes of things I find strange or amusing here in France so I try to make my entries like magazine articles. Like many bloggers I'm testing my writing abilities. Maybe one day I'll write my book but right now I have many other personal and professional projects.
Finally, I have a job (watched me get dooced now!). In my job there are times when I have a huge workload and other times when I have nothing to do so have time to kill until the next mountain of work arrives. I usually write my blogs in word and then copy and paste them into the blog at times when work is quiet. The fact that I work and also that I try to make sure I have something at least half interesting to say before I blog means that I don't blog that often. I try to give as little detail as possible on who I am and absolutely no detail on where I work because I don't want to jeopardize my personal and professional life in any way.
Apart from that I can tell you that I am British, in my twenties, I have lived in France for around 5 years. I came to France firstly for an Erasmus year and then returned to relive what I had experienced during that fabulous Erasmus year. I am here principally because I unexpectedly fell in love with this country and still love France (despite its faults). Monsieur is another reason why I stay here especially in spite of the awful employment market but I met him after I had been living here several years. I have been a language teacher in a school and in the University in Bordeaux and now I work in Paris. I seem to have set myself a challenge to make life work in France, accomplish studies, build a career, fall in love and make that love last, build a family with the man I love … live life in general! I do love England, it is what I have known for twenty years of my life, I don't exclude ever returning to England but for as long as possible, for as much as is possible I want to make my life in France.
As I said above you can't comment on my posts unless you are a fellow blogger, but if you are another expat, blogger, or anyone else (with sincere intentions) who would like to correspond you may of course e-mail me. I comment on French life and the French people as I know them. I have great respect and love for the French and do not wish anything I have written here to be taken as being offensive. Living in France makes me very aware of the faults and peculiarities of the English as well and I'm sure someone in the opposite situation would have things to say about English life.
So there you have it, à vous maintenant!
(P.S. I clearly have a tendency to over-use brackets and digress immensely, but that's me!)
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Expat politics
I was on the train once, happily settled into my seat, magazine on the fold away table in front of me, munching on my sandwich when a fellow passenger came and took his seat beside me. I have to say that he took a while to put his bag and coat on the overhead shelf, take out his computer and the documents he would probably be working on and put a smaller bag under the seat. The whole time this exercise was accompanied by much huffing and puffing and muttering to himself….in English. It was clear that I was next to another Expat.
I would classify expats into four categories:
1) the pensioners – those who are retired and have bought a second home in France and come to live there during their retirement,
2) the working expats – who have been sent here with their families and maybe choose to stay
3) the French lovers – those who have met someone French and have moved with them to France or alternatively those who were here for a temporary period, have met their French partners and now chose to stay,
4) the student – either those on a year abroad or those who having finished a year abroad come here after graduation for a year or two "whilst they decide what to do with their lives" and who can very often fall in love with a French person and then fall into category 3.
Categories 1 and 2 may want to meet other expats because they can't or don't want to learn French and find it easier to have other English speaking friends. Those in categories 3 or 4 may have some expat friends but generally as they want to intergrate into French society, they don't want to meet with other expats. I fall into the 3/4 category, I used to study here, then I came back and started work and now I have met someone. During the years I have spent here I have made other expat friends but don't usually actively seek out other expats.
Often when expats do meet up we can often talk about the French and compare our view of French life. The result of this is that these commentaries can seem rather negative and even insulting. However, we are all here because we love France or the French but as with love, you love but you don't always have to like nor to completely understand. I say this because my blog is exactly that, I love France and I love many things about the French but there are lots of things I find strange and therefore comment on. Consider this as a disclaimer for any harsh comments I might make.
The other problem I sometimes face, when an expats speaks French very well, is discerning when I am in front of an English speaking person and in what language to speak to him or her in. Of course when the conversation starts we speak French but at what point do we give up the act? Some expats have lived her so long that there accent is very light so it is difficult to be sure exactly where they are from. Indeed, if nothing is said, but you think the person next to you/in front of you is English, how do you let the person know?
With the guy on the train I could obviously tell he was English and he was making no attempts to hide it, in fact I would say he wanted those around him to know. I was reading a French magazine and despite my obvious English rose looks, I could have passed for a French person (or at least I like to think so) but I decided I wanted to indicate that I was in fact English. Firstly I rummaged in my bag and took out an English novel (with a WH Smiths sticker) also, whenever he bumped into me as he was settling down or moving during the journey, to his "excuse-moi" I replied "don't worry". Eventually he did click on to the fact that I was British, asked me a question directly in English which then led to us having a conversation for the rest of the journey. We spoke about our respective lives in France. Whenever I do meet an expat I'm fascinated to find out why they are here, for how long and what they do. Naturally, and as mentioned above we did spend a lot of the time talking about the French in the work place and criticizing the system. At the end of the trip I was quite concerned that any French passengers who had overheard and understood our conversation might have thought "well if you don't like the French way of life, why stay here?" and could have been a little insulted.
Finally, there is the situation when you are the secret expat, where you are around English speaking expats who chat in public freely and discussing all sorts of subjects believing that those around them can't understand. Metros and buses are great places for overhearing tourists and other English speakers chat as if they were the only ones there. The issue in such a situation is at what point do you let them know that you are English and can understand or do you stay quiet and listen to what they are saying. On the one hand it is quite interesting, on the other it can be quite embarrassing when it happens to you. I was once on the tram in Bordeaux with a friend discussing in detail the weekends events and a bit of boy trouble when the guy sat next to my friend stood up and said "excuse me, my stop is next" in a very distinct British accent. My friend and I looked at each other shocked realizing what we had been discussing. They guy smiled knowingly and said "don't worry girls, I'm sure it will all work out".
I would classify expats into four categories:
1) the pensioners – those who are retired and have bought a second home in France and come to live there during their retirement,
2) the working expats – who have been sent here with their families and maybe choose to stay
3) the French lovers – those who have met someone French and have moved with them to France or alternatively those who were here for a temporary period, have met their French partners and now chose to stay,
4) the student – either those on a year abroad or those who having finished a year abroad come here after graduation for a year or two "whilst they decide what to do with their lives" and who can very often fall in love with a French person and then fall into category 3.
Categories 1 and 2 may want to meet other expats because they can't or don't want to learn French and find it easier to have other English speaking friends. Those in categories 3 or 4 may have some expat friends but generally as they want to intergrate into French society, they don't want to meet with other expats. I fall into the 3/4 category, I used to study here, then I came back and started work and now I have met someone. During the years I have spent here I have made other expat friends but don't usually actively seek out other expats.
Often when expats do meet up we can often talk about the French and compare our view of French life. The result of this is that these commentaries can seem rather negative and even insulting. However, we are all here because we love France or the French but as with love, you love but you don't always have to like nor to completely understand. I say this because my blog is exactly that, I love France and I love many things about the French but there are lots of things I find strange and therefore comment on. Consider this as a disclaimer for any harsh comments I might make.
The other problem I sometimes face, when an expats speaks French very well, is discerning when I am in front of an English speaking person and in what language to speak to him or her in. Of course when the conversation starts we speak French but at what point do we give up the act? Some expats have lived her so long that there accent is very light so it is difficult to be sure exactly where they are from. Indeed, if nothing is said, but you think the person next to you/in front of you is English, how do you let the person know?
With the guy on the train I could obviously tell he was English and he was making no attempts to hide it, in fact I would say he wanted those around him to know. I was reading a French magazine and despite my obvious English rose looks, I could have passed for a French person (or at least I like to think so) but I decided I wanted to indicate that I was in fact English. Firstly I rummaged in my bag and took out an English novel (with a WH Smiths sticker) also, whenever he bumped into me as he was settling down or moving during the journey, to his "excuse-moi" I replied "don't worry". Eventually he did click on to the fact that I was British, asked me a question directly in English which then led to us having a conversation for the rest of the journey. We spoke about our respective lives in France. Whenever I do meet an expat I'm fascinated to find out why they are here, for how long and what they do. Naturally, and as mentioned above we did spend a lot of the time talking about the French in the work place and criticizing the system. At the end of the trip I was quite concerned that any French passengers who had overheard and understood our conversation might have thought "well if you don't like the French way of life, why stay here?" and could have been a little insulted.
Finally, there is the situation when you are the secret expat, where you are around English speaking expats who chat in public freely and discussing all sorts of subjects believing that those around them can't understand. Metros and buses are great places for overhearing tourists and other English speakers chat as if they were the only ones there. The issue in such a situation is at what point do you let them know that you are English and can understand or do you stay quiet and listen to what they are saying. On the one hand it is quite interesting, on the other it can be quite embarrassing when it happens to you. I was once on the tram in Bordeaux with a friend discussing in detail the weekends events and a bit of boy trouble when the guy sat next to my friend stood up and said "excuse me, my stop is next" in a very distinct British accent. My friend and I looked at each other shocked realizing what we had been discussing. They guy smiled knowingly and said "don't worry girls, I'm sure it will all work out".
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